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CASSANDRA

Poor Cassandra still doesn't get it. She goes about speaking the truth, as if anybody cares. She's a loose cannon at work and a liability at any social function. She's only ever invited because she's pretty.

Yes, I see you baby. Shakin' that ass, hoping to be taken home. Pretending somebody cares.

You can't pretend for long enough my dear, but you will pick it up. We're all just treading water here you know. Speak the truth and we'll all be sucked under by the terrible undertow and we can't have that can we? The currents that move below the surface may be obvious to you but we here prefer not to know.

We have constructed many a rationale to keep us here, afloat and on top. You will not win. The crowd is against you. You need regular visits to soulless fetish nightclubs where you can have the humanity smacked out of you for free by enthusiastic amateurs. Add to that the odd piercing of soft, sweet erectile tissue and you can prove what Janis once sang "that a woman can be tough". It will help you with that secret hope that one day you will stop feeling. I call this building a Leather Jacket for the Soul. A protective layer against the gravel-rash of life.

But look, Cassandra is learning. Flashing a little bit of ass curve from under that tiny PVC mini. Very enticing. Quite a talent you have there my dear, to be able to dance with such frenzy in a mini and show nothing of your filthy hairy gash. Let's just hope she's had her pubic hair appropriately ripped out by a muscled-mary who refers to his opened-up and prone clients as Fish. Better still if she has done it at the behest of a good-looking lover who has been indulging his half-hidden fascination for German pornography.

Oh I'm sorry, I forgot that like myself you did 2 years of university including a semester of Women's Studies so you know not to openly acknowledge your disdain for your own sex.

Still, be careful not to let him piss on you too soon after a triple-X waxing or you'll get an infection in those delicate and exposed little hair-holes. Just between you and me, we know what those Germans like to get up to, don't we.

Yes, you are learning. I think we can do something with you yet.

So your new boy, is he good-looking enough to entice you into a three-some? You really have been behind the 8-ball on that one. Whilst crawling up inside of you has he muttered in your ear about wanting to see you lick out your best friend's bloated cunt? Or having her gently suck his cock while watching you be pumped from behind by his rugger-buggar flatmate?

No? Never mind, that will come. His good looks and a silvery tongue can be as binding as any other lover's fur-lined handcuffs.

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