Handfasting
Disclaimer
Well, I guess every story eventually has an ending. The beginning of this one was very exciting. It was vibrant, it was magical, it was an amazing experience that has left me changed, hopefully for the better, but all good things must come to an end. And unfortuanatly so did this relationship. We've broken up now, and trying to learn how to be friends. There isn't really much resentment, its all quite friendly, just not working. So, I've made the decision to leave these pages here, because this was a very important part of my life, and these pages are representative of a time and of memories that I'd like to keep forever.
Yeah...I know it's self indulgent, but then the whole concept of personal websites is pretty indulgent anyway. You put up personal websites because you believe that out there somewhere are people who may be interested in what you have to say. I guess we are putting this up mainly for our friends who couldn't be at the ceremony, and those who were. We are putting it here for those who are interested. And also to say thank-you to all those who attended the ceremony/s, the party and all those who thought of us and wished us well.
What and Why
On Midsummer's eve, 21st of December,1998, Renee and Madi, in the presence of a small group of close friends, got handfasted. We exchanged a set of vows promising to love and respect and stay with each other you a year and a day. Now I know that doesn't sound like a long time, but think of it as the P-plate version, a kind of probationary period before making the permenent comittment.
A year and a day later, on the 22nd December, 1999, having survived and grown throughout our year and a day, we decided to make the big commitment and get handfasted for life.
Handfasting is a pagan term for a sort of marriage. Traditional pagan handfasting often involve blessings, invoking the good will of the god/goddess, marking the elements etc, and usually have a pagan priest or priestess officiating. Pagan is a loose term with a whole plethora of interpetations, most of which depend entirely on the individual. I'm sure someone will argue with me about this incredibly simplistic definition and description. But, for the minute, its good enough.
I guess I'll talk about what it means to us, and why we did it. Neither me nor Madi would particularly describe ourselves as pagan, although if pushed would admit to having a belief system that is spiritual in a way that does not conform to any formalised, ritual system. Handfasting for us was a convenient way of exchanging a vow of committment that meant something and was important to us, without being bound by any laws, religions or cicumstances beyond our control. We made a simple set of vows that we both agreed to. And the Ceremony was performed by two close friends Morgan and Marian. Neither of them are official celebrants. We wanted to make the vows, but we also wanted them to be on our terms in our way.
The second ceremony was smaller. It was performed by Morgan with
assistance from Aveline. We didn't have a large group of witnesses
this time. Just Neef and Megan, which was all we felt we needed. The